Addicted
by TamakiCat
Summary: Spock can't stop thinking about Kirk since two weeks. He wonders why this began and tries to get rid of it ... SLASH. Spock/Kirk. SPIRK.
1. Chapter 1 The Truth

_**Author's Notes :**_ Hi! :D I found back this fanfiction while looking for Star Trek fanfictions on-hold in my pc ^^ ! So glad I did for it was almost finished and yay people! It's Spirk :D ! So, I hope you'll enjoy :)!

_**Disclaimer :**_ I own nothing of it but my representation of the beautiful characters, the idea of this fanfiction, this fanfiction and my writing style :D !

_**Addicted**_

_**1. The Truth**_

Spock was playing with his fingers as he walked down the corridor that led to the deck room. Sometimes he would gaze at decorating things such as a plant or a beautiful piece of art that Jim would surely describe as "something quite marvelous but that he did not like". Though Spock could not understand the meaning of liking something, he still respected deeply what his captain had to say.

He arrived at the door and finally entered the deck room. As Spock gave looks around the room, he realized that they were only three in there : Himself, Scotty and Sulu. He knew his captain was on his way but still, somehow, he still felt a thud in his stomach for he hoped to see him here as soon as possible. Why he hoped to see him soon was not a question he could answer to for he did not know alot about feelings. All he knew was that two weeks ago he felt this thud anytime Jim would be away or late but Spock thought that this was somehow stupid and useless for he knew Kirk was still there and there was other people Spock could talk to if ever he felt the need to, even though it was rare Spock talked to anyone but Jim. The Vulcan suspected all this strange happening to have begun way before two weeks ago but he could not put his finger on the when it did begin.

Spock, who had been thinking a bit about his captain and why he felt this uncomfortable ... feeling, as he could call it ... shook his head and decided to have a conversation with one of the two other people in the room in order to forget momentarily about all this : " Mister Sulu, I know that you do your job very well but can I ask you if we still are in orbit around Planeta ? "

Sulu, caught off guard by Spock's sentence for he did not hear him enter the deck room replied : " Yeah, yeah of course, Spock ! The only reason we would not be would be me getting sick ! "

" Then I hope you will not, Mister Sulu. " calmly said Spock.

He could not stop thinking about Jim and his whereabouts. Was he really on his way ? Or was he simply joking around just to make them wait a bit longer so they'll all be a bit angry and thus making him laugh ? Spock breathed deeply, trying to get his mind off of this subject for he had to think of other things. It was getting a tad annoying for he could never do as well in his job as he did before the two weeks. He was always thinking about Jim but somehow, Spock did not totally hate it ... in fact, he spent nights and days trying to figure out what could have led him to that but he did not find why. He intended on doing so but maybe now just wasn't the time.

Jim stepped into the room.

Spock turned round and saw his captain coming into the room. As he did so, Spock felt a huge wave of relief and sweet joy to see him in here. But Spock was uncertain of how to react to the sweet joy he was feeling for he never experienced that kind of joy. It felt as if his whole body had been released from a big stress or unhappy event and that it was sweetly shaking from the inside with a soft " Oh, I'm so happy to see you there, I was afraid you would never come but I'm relieved now plus I just see you everywhere, even in my soup " thought-like feeling that flowed inside his body. Even his eyes showed this tenderness that Spock never really had before. But Jim Kirk didn't really notice that ... No, he just walked forward in order to get to his chair.

As he was going round Spock, he turned his head towards him and gave him one of his most beautiful and seductive smiles with his blue eyes gleaming like orbs some centimeters higher. Those eyes that Spock had always found intriguing were now hooking him up in them until Jim reached his chair that had its back on the shy vulcan. Spock just didn't know what was happening to him and that somehow scared him. But instead of letting it show, he preferred to straighten himself up a bit, not that he wasn't already staightened up but just to make the others understand that he still had his feet on the ground.

Jim suddenly let out a few words : "So, Spock, how was that morning of yours ? "

Spock could simply sense Jim's wondrous and teasing smile in his words.

" It was filled with diverse .... thoughts. " Spock added in a sigh. Even after all he tried to get away from this, some images of Jim kept playing in his mind as if they meant to stay against Spock's will. Or perhaps, it was indeed Spock's hidden will that even he did not want to admit to himself ....

" Thoughts ? " asked Jim, frowning. "I see you've been quite busy, Spock ." Jim chuckled a bit. He still had that teasing smile on his face that made Spock feel awkward.

"Why, yes, Captain. Like always." Spock answered in a neutral voice for he tried to not let his ... thinking unstabilites show too much.

He raised his head high up and looked straight in front of him as he walked forward until he was at Jim's side. He hoped the day would go well ...

And this meant without any other strange interruptions made by his constant thoughts and "never-felt-before" feelings.


	2. Chapter 2 Confused

_**Author's Notes:**_ Hiya! I know it's taken long for me to write this, but hey, sorry! Real life stuff... But now it's here :D Hope you like it! Spock is sooooo confused.

_**Disclaimer:**_ I own nothing but this fanfic, the idea of this fanfic, my representation of these characters and my writing style :).

Enjoy and comment please!

_**Addicted**_

_**Chapter 2. Confused**_

Spock had spent about 2 hours today with the crew on the deck. No real disturbance happened in Spock's opinion, but for the fact that the captain still sneakily made his way into Spock's mind. Even though he focused on his work, the machines and the crew on the bridge, he still had Kirk in the back of his mind.

He felt himself becoming a bit sweaty and he couldn't understand why because that meant he was nervous and Spock was...well...rarely nervous. It was against nature. Almost. Those who knew Vulcans knew that. He rubbed his hands together and realized they were moist. This obviously wasn't a good sign. Was he going mad?

Spock looked around not pretty subtedly, making sure no one was looking his way and then, he quickly and roughly wiped off the sweat of his hands on his pants. It wasn't hygienic, but oh well... After a bit of a shameful feeling he desperately was trying to supress, he punched his card to indicate his work was done for now and said a loud and neutral ''goodbye'' to everyone who was still on the deck walking out of the room.

As he difficutlty crossed the main corridor due to his all new light (but still there) shaking, the image of the captain Kirk came back with force on his mind. And it wouldn't leave him in peace. He turned the corner and crashed into the origin of his unease of the day.

'Hey! Oh! Hi, Spock! How are y- Is something wrong, Spock?' asked Kirk with a frown, looking at his First Officer's shaking hands.

'Er... ar...erm...' stammered Spock.

'Oh, what is wrong with me? I am stuttering, sweating, obsessed with Jim... Did I really think 'obsessed'? Oh no...' he thought.

'Yyyess?' insisted Kirk with a constant and worried frown.

'Erm, yes! I am quite sorry, Captain! I... Yes. It seems right to admit that something is wrong...' answered Spock in a lower voice than usual.

One could have speculated that the Vulcan was experiencing shame toward his sayings... Though, no one could be sure since the concerned one didn't even admit it or realize it himself.

'And what is it, Spock?'

Kirk had apparently stopped being suspicious and frowning and was now just deeply concerned with his friend's misery. A Vulcan never lied nor almost never admitted something was going wrong with himself, and THAT worried Jim to death. Though, since he was the captain and Spock's closest friend, he tried to contain his unease and act rationally as though to encline his friend into trusting him even though it wasn't really necessary since he did it already. But still...

Spock opened then closed his hands repeatedly in order to feel the sweat as a mean to remind himself of what he was going through. Then, after a few seconds spent doing so, he lifted his head up a bit and looked straight into Kirk's eyes as if he had just been declared a lost puppy...

'It's like I'm not me, Captain.'


End file.
